Journal: Saturday, March 19th. 11:43 pm.
Todays Show @ SXSW was cancelled last minute. Piano didn't show up in time. I just caught a Greyhound bus for a 19 hr treck back to nashville. In the past 3 days, I have learned this: Weed does crazy things to people. I don't say this with judgement... I can say this because I know...I've smoked enough weed In my 36 years to kill a tribe of Indians.....it steals the ability to deliver, perform, feel, and communicate....ultimatley leaving most relationships unfulfilled. Does this sound like the music business?
SXSW, along with the remaining music industry that was there, is a corporate orgasm, with nearly 2000 bands trying to "make it" in 4 days. Interesting times we live in. I have stood in the middle of the deepest and highest levels of selfishness that I have ever seen. A sea full of hope untapped, with a constant scent of lingering weed for everyone to partake. Brokeness at its finest. They have Sadness that deeply aches to be heard, yet they have nothing to say. The lies they believe have stolen their speech. Its as though I have come to a party outside of the cemetary gates. I have to believe there is more than this for artists and creative people. I am Happy to have been there. I have seen the table from which I must not eat....and I consider this experience a beautiful reminder. Any further steps in that direction will lead me to my ruin. The change that must come to fix this mess will not be for the faint of heart.
I have also re-learned this:
The music business takes no prisoners.....everyone who chooses to enter, must die. Those who aren't willing to say goodbye, will be spectators to death, blinded by foolishness. For those who will be part of the change, it must consist of far more concern and focus on character, rather than reputation. The next generation that will be part of the change must be willing to take down the liars and egotistical boasters with no shame, and they will have to do it like warriors who are masters in a Chess game......... Ruthless......yet Sensitive and Gentle.
My closing thought:
Those who Talk, more than Listen....are most of the problem. The very few who can listen, are scared shitless to do anything about it....and the time for that very few to rise up, has come....and I am going to be one of artists that help encourage the few in doing so....for once they conquer their fears, find a deeper value in character than reputation, and learn how to deliver their words and actions with knowledge and wisdom....we will begin to see the change we are longing for...but finding and preserving Art & Music in Raw form, that carries purity and honesty with no greed or agenda, is an uphill fight...and It will be one hell of a War for those who are willing to die for it. I pray that I am worthy enough to find blood on my hands for the right reasons, and not the wrong.
God be with you.....for if he isn't...you're fucked!
*Sorry for grammatical errors and typos. This wasn't easy to type from a cel phone on a Greyhound Bus. I'm Still In Texas. The toilet just blew up....damn bus smells like a pig farm.
Peace. Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
*I found the video below only 48 hours upon my return to Nashville.
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